Mommy, the popular kids called me a dork!

......She went to the doctor got lipo with ya money
......She walkin around lookin like Michael with ya money
-Kanye West

I find myself out of the loop lately with this whole lipo thing...Boob jobs, ass reduction, tummy tucks. Why do I find myself so un-cool for not thinking about doing any of these things? I have an ass, what gives? Who put this standard on what a human body should look like anyways.
Two ladies on the bus the other day were talking about boob jobs, which is what makes me bring this up. They both were going on and on about what they would change on their bodies, what they did not like. Hips, boobs, nose, lips...ears?

I wanted to look at them and slap them, because you already know what they look and acted like. They were both a size 0, blonde, big boobed, trendy, "popular". As I sat there on the bus with my sweatpants, baggy sweatshirt, hair thrown up in a pony tail, no make-up, and sandals with duck tape on them (you know which ones I'm talking about). The last thing on my mind was, o shitty, my boobs, lips, nose or whatever else doesn't look good with this outfit.

I get home and the topic on the television is plastic surgery with the stars. Television shows are doing reality shows about transforming the body, making the dorky and fatty people, popular and prettier. O hell, I must have missed the memo about changing your body and becoming popular. I spent the rest of the day crying because I was and would remain a dork. I'm always a century behind the times.